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10 Things to feel ridiculously, gleefully, unabashedly hopeful about

4/17/2020

30 Comments

 
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Whoa. 
 
That’s the feeling we get every time we turn on the news or check social media these days, as things seem to keep getting worse.
 
It’s hard NOT to feel down, depressed, and despondent during these unprecedented times, with millions of people sick, thousands dying, and the whole economy shut down. 
 
There seems to be no quick solution or even solid answers, and it sure feels like the average person has been left to his or her own devices.
 
It’s all too much.
 
Then again, in those rare occasions that I'm able to throw the covers off and actually get out of bed, put down my third bowl of Peanut Butter Captain Crunch (note: I highly recommend it), or stop walking in circles around the house like a zombie, I realize that maybe things aren’t completely hopeless.
 
In fact, the sun is shining. I’m blessed to still have a roof over my head and food on the table, and the ability to control my own destiny, no matter how difficult that task may seem.
 
As usual, things may not be quite as bad as they seem. 
 
I can hit you with rosy platitudes like “It’s always darkest before the dawn,” or even start singing “Don’t worry; be happy,” but I’m not going to minimize what we’re up against (and you don’t want to hear my singing!).
 
Furthermore, intangibles and Trumpian double-speak do us no good at this point. We need some real and substantial cornerstones that make us feel optimistic about coming days.
 
So, here are 10 things to feel ridiculously, gleefully, unabashedly hopeful about:

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1.  Animal shelters are emptying That's great news if you're a pet lover, as people are adopting and rescuing dogs, cats, and other lovable critters at a record rate. In fact, some dog shelters have posted videos lately, showing that they're completely empty! It turns out, we all want a lovable four-legged friend at home to keep us company.

​(My dog, Pupperoni, is patiently waiting for me to return to the Philippines or I'd adopt five more here in Connecticut!)


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2.  The words ‘neighbor’ and ‘community’ mean something again
During good times, we were all a little guilty of fortifying ourselves in our McMansions and going about our own business.

​But now, people are more interested in helping, supporting, and just getting to know those around them again. We're sitting on our front porches and saying hi, making meals for seniors, and giving away things we used to try to sell. Young people, especially, are stepping up and showing character.


Isn’t it ironic that we’re more isolated than ever but feel a new sense of communal and civic pride?

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3.  Mom-n-Pop businesses are getting love
I don’t know about you, but I’m loving the rejuvenated relationship we have with local restaurants, Mom-n-Pop stores, and neighborhood businesses that are still operating. It seems like we appreciate them more than ever, and we’re actively supporting them with our dollars, (our stomachs), and by spreading the word. 
 
Think about when this is over; will you head to Chilis or Bed, Bath, and Beyond?! No! You’ll run to a local or Mom-n-Pop business to eat, drink, and shop to your heart’s content!

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4.  In some ways, we're becoming more human
As we traverse this storm of suffering with no relief in sight, I've noticed that people are becoming more human again. I liken it to the days after 9/11, when everyone waved and said hello, held the door open for each other, and generally remembered that we share the planet with others.

In fact, charity donations and volunteerism have skyrocketed already during this crisis, a heartwarming trend I expect to continue. 

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5.  We have time again​
Are we finally stopping to smell the roses? Looks like it, as we finally have a moment to pause, breathe, and not be rushed every minute of every day.

​Sure, we're bored, but our family dinners have become longer, we're talking to friends and family more than ever (even if it's virtually), and we're dusting off long-forgotten hobbies and passions. We're taking bike rides, doing yoga, learning (online) and reading, and taking walks with our kids every sunset. There may not be too many silver linings to these challenging times, but the fact that we can hit pause on the world for a moment is a once-in-a-lifetime occurrence.

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6.  People are getting their priorities straight
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Although what’s to come will be extremely painful, we also are recalibrating our priorities, which will have a positive effect for the rest of our lives. All of a sudden, we are filled with appreciation just to have a hot meal, the chance to talk to an old friend, or when we get to hug our family safely every night. And just being healthy for another day feels like an enormous blessing.
 
Maybe we needed a little wake-up call? 

Well, this is it, and many of us are already listening, focusing on simplifying our lives and living with newfound gratitude.

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7.    Nature is our saving grace!
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My anxiety (ok, abject panic!) often rises to a boiling point when I stay inside to work, watch the news, or scroll through social media. Then, I step outside, and everything feels better. 

Even a few minutes out in my backyard or at the local park reminds me that some of the best things in life are the fresh air (allergy season notwithstanding), blue skies, blooming flowers, and wild animals. 
 
Many of us are lucky enough to experience nature in one way or another, and the planet even seems to be healing itself a little with less pollution and more space for wildlife to roam again.

A lot of people around the world (more US people will start doing this if they're smart) are even starting to plant home gardens and grow their own food. Clean energy may even become more sustainable through all this. Hell, maybe there is just a spark of hope for the planet? 

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8.  We have a new appreciation for the little people (who, it turns out, were never little at all!)
We'll look back at these dark days and remember the heroes, new leaders, and regular people who exhibited remarkable courage and sacrifice. We all have a new appreciation for teachers, police officers, first responders, doctors and nurses, bus drivers, grocery store workers, social workers, and all sorts of other extraordinary humans that sometimes go unappreciated. 
 
I'm sure you've seen the videos of New Yorkers applauding and cheering their local healthcare workers during the nightly 7 pm shift change. I propose that we keep that tradition alive after this is all over – and expand it to show love and respect for a whole lot more "little people" who are huge in our lives.

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9.  Change is coming
Just a few weeks ago, the world we live in now would be inconceivable.

(Would you ever imagine that you're required to wear a mask when walking into a bank?!)

Absolutely everything has changed, and we're still trying to wrap our collective psyche around that. 

There will be pain and suffering to come; there's no avoiding it. But this grandest of transformations will also bring a chance to reinvent just about every aspect of our society - and even the human experience.  We are blessed and cursed with the responsibility of rebuilding our world, and no one knows exactly what that look like except that it will be new.

Change is inevitable as it is imminent. It's now the age of rebirth for activists, artists, healers, designers, dreamers, teachers, empaths, environmentalists, inventors, underdogs, outcasts,  leaders, and, especially the youth, as we've turned this world into a fuster cluck and it's time to let the next 

The meek may just inherit the earth, after all...and I'm hopeful that they'll take far better care of it than we ever did.

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10.  People are ready to start living again 
Psychologists outline a process that we go through whenever we suffer a grave loss or tragedy, with stages from shock to denial, anger, bargaining, depression, reconciliation, and then, acceptance. 
 
I don't know about you, but I think they're missing a couple of stages like, "Wearing the same sweatpants for 72 hours" and "Drinking wine at 10 am while holding a full conversation with the mailbox."
 
But there will be an eighth stage at the end of all this: Ready.
 
People will be ready:
Ready to work.
Ready to rebuild.
Ready to experience.
Ready to learn.

Ready to heal.
Ready to give.
Ready to connect.
Ready to love without censor or fear.
 
Very soon, we’ll be ready to LIVE again!
 
That alone is something to feel incredibly hopeful about, and I think it’s coming sooner than we may realize.
 
Trust me when I tell you; You’ll want to be around for the dancing in the streets after these dark days are over!

-Norm  :-)

PS If you found this helpful or uplifting at all, can you please do me a favor and share it on social media? Thanks a billion!

30 Comments

Cabbages & condoms? A perfect pairing for a great cause at this Thailand restaurant

3/15/2016

1 Comment

 
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​If you’ve spent enough time in Thailand, very little will shock you, and yet I had to do a double take when I saw the sign across the street from my hotel in the Hu-Gwang Bay area right outside of Pattaya: “Cabbages and Condoms.”
 
I was not mistaken; nor was I hallucinating – that was really the name of the restaurant (that adorned the Birds and Bees Resort, appropriately.)
 
Amid all the idyllic white-sand beaches, tropical islands, Buddhist Pagodas shrouded in incense smoke, spicy street dishes, local Thais warm smiles and plenty of Muay Thai camps where they are trained to knock out someone’s warm smile (I was there for something like the latter – a karate training camp) lies the bacchanalian madness of Pattaya. 

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​In fact, Pattaya is like the Las Vegas of Thailand; and consider that Thailand is like the Las Vegas of the world; that actually makes Las Vegas the Pattaya Super Light of the United States.
 
But if you scrape beneath the cliché tourist facade you’ll actually discover fragments of a fascinating and meaningful culture, and that was the case when our karate Shihan (instructor/master) and longtime Thailand resident, Judd Reid, brought us to Cabbages and Condoms for our celebratory last meal of the training camp.
 
It definitely defied easy definitions when we first walked in. A path led us into the jungle like explorers of yesteryear wielding machetes to cut back the bush on their way to an epic discovery. As we meandered deeper into the grounds (which is also a resort with great villas and a beautiful infinity pool) we passed tropical gardens, flower beds, bamboo foot bridges about streams with tropical fish, and saw chickens and even rabbits running free on well-manicured lawns.

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​As we walked along the footpath under rustic bamboo hanging lanterns, I stopped short more than a tuk-tuk in Bangkok traffic, intent on snapping a photo of almost every sign along the way. Some of them listed self-help mantras, anti-government rhetoric, famous poems, quotes by notable human rights activists, and even prompted us to make philosophical and political choices depending on which way we walked.
 
Once we reached the restaurant there were even mannequins dressed in garments pieced together with hundred of condoms (sans wrapper) – a bizarre fashion show with prophylactics the wardrobe.
 
I barely had time to process it all as we arrived at the restaurant and ended up at a series on outdoor decks that staggered down the hill and jutted over the ocean, with a view of locals joyfully playing in the waves on the sliver of private beach below. 

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​The only thing better than the view as the flaming sunset slipped behind the horizon was the food - which far surpassed expectations.

What on earth is this place, I thought – both one of the most beautiful and paradoxical settings I’d ever witnessed.

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In fact, Cabbages & Condoms is not just one restaurant but a chain, with establishments in Chang Rai, Khao Yai, Krabi, Bangkok and Pattaya in Thailand, as well as two locations in the UK.  (Note: Although the Bangkok restaurant is the original, I had friends eat ether and said the food was subpar.)

​It was originally the brainchild of one man named Mechai Viravaidya, a half-Thai, half-Scottish national who grew up and was educated in Scotland and Australia with a focus on family planning and social advocacy. In 1965, Viravaidya returned to Thailand, where he began working to curb the substandard medical care for women, ignorance as to proper family planning strategies, and traditional norms that were prevalent in the country.

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At that time, condoms were still very much taboo and not at all popular (and expensive), and so locals rarely used them. Socially transmitted diseases - and later HIV and AIDS - spread unchecked throughout the population, and family planning and modern women’s health was almost nonexistent among the poor, uneducated, and those living in remote rural communities.

​Noting that you could buy cabbages in any market, shop or restaurant, Viravaidya declared that getting condoms should at least be that easy.
 
“You can go to any shop around Thailand and you will always find cabbages,” he explained years later. “Condoms should be like cabbages which are ubiquitous and accessible to everyone.”
 
Hence, the origin for the name of his restaurant, Cabbages & Condoms, was born.

But this restaurant wasn’t just a novelty. Cabbages and Condoms was actually the keystone initiative of a non-profit service organization called the Population and Community Development Association (PDA), which aimed to better the lives of the country’s poor. Viravaidya left his civil service job in 1973 to found the organization (called the ‘PDA’) and enlisted some creative measures to popularize condoms and remove their stigma, including condom blowing contests for school kids and gave condoms to taxi drivers to disseminate (pun intended!) to their customers.


All of the profits from the newly formed restaurant, Cabbages & Condoms, went to support PDA programs focusing on primary health, birth control, education, HIV/AIDS, environment, poverty eradication and water resource development, eventually becoming one of the biggest NGOs (charities) in Thailand with more than 600 employees and 12,000 volunteers.
 

Viravaidya gained admiration and respect for his efforts and went on to serve as the deputy minister of industry, minister of tourism, information, and AIDS, and even on the Thai senate in 2004.
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​His legacy is still gold-plated in the Kingdom of Siam, where condoms are still sometimes referred to as “mechais,” a tribute to the first name of “Mr. Condom.” More importantly, even as HIV and AIDs spread rampantly in many developing countries around the world in the 1980s and 90s, reaching epidemic proportions in many African and other Southeast Asian countries, Thailand reacted quickly thanks to the tireless work and social progress Viravaidya. Not only were HIV and AIDS levels normalized, but the average number of children in Thai families decreased from 3.7 to 1.5 during his tenure – a testament to education, family planning, and the societal acceptance of condoms.
 
In 2007, Mechai Viravaidya was honored with the Bill & Melinda Gates Foundation's Gates Award – including a $1,000,000 check - in recognition of his life’s work of family planning, HIV and AIDS awareness, women’s health, and advocacy for the poor.
 
That explained why there were photos of Viravaidya posing alongside Bill Gates, Bill Clinton, Warren Buffet, and other philanthropists, celebrities, and heads of states adorning the restaurant walls; not at all what you’d expect from a restaurant with the slogan, “Our food is guaranteed not to cause pregnancy.”

 


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    Norm Schriever

    Norm Schriever is a best-selling author, expat, cultural mad scientist, and enemy of the comfort zone. He travels the globe, telling the stories of the people he finds, and hopes to make the world a little bit better place with his words.   

    Norm is a professional blogger, digital marketer for smart brands around the world,  and writes for the Huffington Post, Hotels.com, and others.

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