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Why I Don't Live Life to the Fullest

8/31/2016

81 Comments

 
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It’s trendy these days to publically proclaim how much you’re loving your life and really living it up.
 
“I live life to the fullest” is a saying often repeated.
 
It’s usually attached to a photo of the person hiking or at a nice beach, celebrating with friends in Vegas, or while posing in front of their shiny new Range Rover.
 
“I live my life to the fullest” is also a recurring mantra for Facebook posts, hashtags on Instagram, and profiles on dating sites like Tinder, JustCuddling.com and TheAmishNeedLoveToo.net
 
No one really knows from whence the “I life my life to the fullest” slogan sprung, but it’s so damn ubiquitous now that it’s even too cliché for a t-shirt. And they’ll put anything on those!
 
In fact, “I live my life to the fullest” has also morphed into:
 
“I keep it 100!” (I assume that’s percent, not miles per hour.)
 
“’Living the dream!”
 
And for one brief but dark period in human existence, “Living la vida loca.”
 
But what does it really mean? To me, it seems like it’s always in the context of the person:
 
Doing more.
Being more.
Going harder.
Making more money.
Achieving more.
Taking advantage of every second.
Never being bored or inactive.
Enjoying luxuries and the finer things in life.
 
Don’t get me wrong – all of that is great. No one can argue that these aren’t noble pursuits if that’s what motivates you and makes you happy. But I can’t help but notice that they usually have one thing in common:
 
More.
 
They all talk about getting something that you don’t have now. It could be more money, having more good times or looking more like a super model. But when you get down to it, “I live my life to the fullest” really has become “Look at me! I’m having way more fun than the rest of you schlubs!”
 
In some way, we’re all guilty of this. We leave breadcrumbs of social proof that we’re more fulfilled with our time here on earth than the average person. But whom exactly are we trying to convince? Ourselves?
 
Of course, having goals and ambitions is amazing, but have you ever noticed that we don't ever talk about living life to the fullest along with photos of us:
 
Spending time with our children,
Saving to get out of debt,
Or volunteering at a homeless shelter.
 
Is it then a condemning statement about what we value most as a society? Why is it that the majority of the population claims to be living life to the fullest, yet we have record rates of anxiety, depression and are more stressed out than ever?
 
Perhaps it’s another popular saying that sheds the most light on “I live life to the fullest”:
 
“F.O.M.O.” or Fear of Missing Out. It seems to me that these two concepts are inexorably tied.
 
So I’d like to balance the conversation with this:
 
Sometimes, it’s perfectly fine not to live life to the fullest. Do something or do nothing – it doesn’t always matter. In fact, do whatever the hell you want just as long as it makes YOU happy (DISCLAIMER: assuming you’re not stealing from the elderly, exposing yourself in public or hurting puppies.)
 
If you thoroughly enjoy something, then just do it without all the guilt and self-condemnation. Give yourself permission not to keep competing against an impossible ideal.
 
Take a nap. Then take another one.
Drive a beat up old car that ruins any chance you have of attracting a suitable mate.
Stay home on a Saturday night when “everyone else” is out partying, then order a pizza then eat it all yourself, including parts of the box with melted cheese.
Exercise because it feels good and makes you healthier, not so you'll look a certain way. 
 
I guess what I’m saying is that it would be healthy if we stopped feeling like we always need to rush around trying to get more, do more or be more.
 
We are and have everything we need already.
 
What we need is more genuine happiness and less trying to prove that we’re so damn happy to everyone else.

- Norm  :-)


81 Comments

Your September 2016 Postcard From Norm

8/26/2016

11 Comments

 
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I want to do a better job keeping in touch with all of my friends, new and old, far and near, but email newsletters are too formal and I want to keep it more fun and personal.

So I decided to share this digital "postcard" every month, highlighting a few things that were going on.

I hope you like it - and I'd love to hear from you, too! 
​
-Norm  :-)

Why I don't live life to the fullest

Picture
It’s trendy these days to publically proclaim how much you’re loving your life and really living it up.
 
“I live life to the fullest” is a saying often repeated.
 
It’s usually attached to a photo of the person hiking or at a nice beach, celebrating with friends in Vegas, or while posing in front of their shiny new Range Rover.
 
“I live my life to the fullest” is also a recurring mantra for Facebook posts, hashtags on Instagram, and profiles on dating sites like Tinder, JustCuddling.com and TheAmishNeedLoveToo.net
 
No one really knows from whence the “I life my life to the fullest” slogan sprung, but it’s so damn ubiquitous now that it’s even too cliché for a t-shirt. And they’ll put anything on those!

Read More

Views from the front porch

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Coming home to Connecticut once a year gives me a chance to see my family, spend time with my fast-growing niece and nephews, and generally take a break from the rigors of travel and living in developing countries. In fact, the 90-degree heat of Connecticut summer feels cool to me and is a great respite from tropical Asia.

But this is no eight week vacation, as I’m still working as hard (or harder) as I always do. But one of the things I enjoy most is sitting out on my mom’s front porch to work. With my laptop balanced on my knees, iced coffee, headphones to listen to sports radio, and a portable fan I plug in, I don’t have a single complaint about putting in long hours at the “office.”

 
Decades form now when I remember my mother’s house, I’ll always think of that front porch and how nice life looked when I was sitting there.

The Young Lions book  is out!

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​The last ten months I’ve been co-authoring a book about my friend Judd Reid's life in Kyokushin karate. The Young Lions follows Judd as a karate-obsessed youth from a broken home in Australia to being hand-selected to train under a living karate legend, Mas Sosai Oyama, in Japan.
 
Judd went to Tokyo in 1990 without knowing anyone or speaking the language and was immediately immersed as an uchi deshi, or live-in student, in Sosai Oyama’s Young Lions program. For 1,000 days they trained intensively, working out three times a day under the most spartan conditions. The book is filled with Judd's stories of superhuman athletic and physical feats, impenetrable mental toughness, and the ups and downs of these young karate disciples as they sacrificed everything to chase their dreams. Judd went on to a professional fighting career and championship before undertaking the penultimate challenge,  the legendary 100-man Kumite.

​If you like marital arts, the fight game, or just inspiration biographies you'll love this book!  You can catch it on Amazon or share with this link: ​
TinyURL.com/TheYoungLions


The first hamburger in the world

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​My hometown and state is world famous for its pizza, but the first hamburger was actually invented right here in New Haven, Connecticut at the venerable Louis Lunch.  

The buns are toasted bread and they don’t even have ketchup or mustard.

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In fact, you’re likely to get thrown out on the street if you ask for them! Run by the great grandson of the founder, they still use the same cast-iron grills and cooking method as they did when the hamburger was first invented in 1900 when one of their customers wanted a steak sandwich that they could eat on the go. It’s an interesting place! 

What else? 

I still volunteer for great small non-profits overseas and at home, like the The Connecting Hands Café in Cambodia, the Childrens' Improvement Center orphanage in that same country, and Willow Tree Roots.org in California.
With your help, the children at the CIO orphanage were able to secure their own land and are building a permanent new home! Contact me if you'd like to help.
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To keep sane when visiting my hometown, I work out at a great local martial arts gym,  SoulCraft BJJ.  Muay Thai or Krav Maga class is always thoroughly humbling but a blast. My workout partners were even nice enough to give me a souvenir recently - a huge gash on my chin from a headbutt! Instead of going to the ER and getting stitches, I patched it up myself. You can't even notice it, right? 
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In a couple weeks, I’ll head ‘cross-country to California for a couple months before I take the lonnnggg flight back to Asia some time in November. I’m really looking forward to seeing all of my friends in Cali, from Sactown to the Bay and even LA and hopefully San Diego this time.

​Hit me up if you want to say hi and catch up!
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11 Comments

We can ALL cheer for this team during the 2016 Rio Olympics.

8/5/2016

0 Comments

 
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As the 2016 Summer Olympics unfolds in Rio de Janeiro, many of you will be cheering on the United States, or the country you are from, where you live, or even where your ancestors originated. But there is one team that I encourage you to root for this Olympics because you’re a good human being – not a good patriot or citizen.
 
For the first time in history, there’s a team that represents not a nation, but the entire refugee population in the world.  Competing in Rio 2016 in various events like judo, swimming, track and field and judo, this team has no official country because its members have been displaced and cast from their homes; by war, famine, ethnic, religious, and racial strife, and more war.
 
I’d like to introduce you to the Refugee Olympic Team (ROT).
 
In fact, these ten athletes will compete as the first-ever Refugee Olympic team to honor the 19 million refugees and asylum seekers around the world. Named by the Executive Board (EB) of the International Olympic Committee (IOC), these ten athletes come from five different countries, and all have unique stories of how they were displaced and cast out.

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But one thing in common: they may have adopted nations now, but cannot go home.
 
“These refugees have no home, no team, no flag, no national anthem,” said IOC President Thomas Bach. “We will offer them a home in the Olympic Village together with all the athletes of the word. The Olympic anthem will be played in their honour and the Olympic flag will lead them into the Olympic Stadium.”
 
The international refugee situation has, unfortunately, gotten markedly worse in the last few years, reaching crisis levels. Too often, refugees are women and children that face insurmountable odds and danger of exploitation, violence, and trafficking. However, just four years ago during the 2012 Summer Olympics in London, there were only 11 million refugees in the word. But that number has skyrocketed by nearly three-quarters since, due to conflicts in Syria, Iran, Ethiopia, South Sudan, and Democratic Republic of Congo.

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Some of them were Olympic-level athletes for their home countries before they were forced to flee for their lives, like Judo athletes Popole Misenga and Yolande Mabika from Congo. Others, like swimmer Yusra Mardini from Syria, swam not for sport but for survival when her family’s boat broke down on their way from Turkey and Greece. The shared experience forged and bonded other athletes, like the five-man team of Sudanese runners who were discovered while living in a refugee camp.
 
When these ten proud and distinguished Olympians march under their own flag during the opening ceremonies, wear the colors of their new team, and compete against the best of the best in the world, whether they win gold medals or lose, they’ll win our hearts.
 
Here are the athletes of the 2016 Refugee Olympic Team (ROT):
 
¥          Rami Anis (M): Country of origin – Syria; host NOC – Belgium; sport – swimming
¥          Yiech Pur Biel (M): Country of origin – South Sudan; host NOC – Kenya; sport – athletics, 800m
¥          James Nyang Chiengjiek (M): Country of origin – South Sudan; host NOC – Kenya; sport – athletics, 400m
¥          Yonas Kinde (M): Country of origin – Ethiopia; host NOC – Luxembourg; sport – athletics, marathon
¥          Anjelina Nada Lohalith (F): Country of origin – South Sudan; host NOC – Kenya; sport – athletics, 1500m
¥          Rose Nathike Lokonyen (F): Country of origin – South Sudan; host NOC – Kenya; sport – athletics, 800m
¥          Paulo Amotun Lokoro (M): Country of origin – South Sudan; host NOC – Kenya; sport – athletics, 1500m
¥          Yolande Bukasa Mabika (F): Country of origin – Democratic Republic of the Congo; host NOC – Brazil; sport – Judo
¥          Yusra Mardini (F): Country of origin – Syria; host NOC – Germany; sport – swimming
¥          Popole Misenga (M): Country of origin – Democratic Republic of the Congo; host NOC – Brazil; sport – Judo
 
So please join me and cheer loud and proud for #TeamRefugee because they represent the true spirit of the Olympics – and the best of human kind.

- Norm :-)

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    Norm Schriever

    Norm Schriever is a best-selling author, expat, cultural mad scientist, and enemy of the comfort zone. He travels the globe, telling the stories of the people he finds, and hopes to make the world a little bit better place with his words.   

    Norm is a professional blogger, digital marketer for smart brands around the world,  and writes for the Huffington Post, Hotels.com, and others.

    Check out South of Normal his Amazon.com best-selling book about life as an expat in Tamarindo, Costa Rica.

    Cambodia's School of Hope explores education and empowerment in impoverished Cambodia, with 100% of sales going to that school.

    The Book Marketing Bible provides 99 essential strategies for authors and marketers.

    Pushups in the Prayer Room, is a wild, irreverent memoir about a year backpacking around the world.  

    Follow Norm on Twitter @NormSchriever or email any time to say hi!

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